Give & Take

Give and Take...when you start socializing in the very initial years of your life, this concept is beyond you! But as you grow, it gets so ingrained into your psyche that going beyond it becomes impossible for you.

Imagine a Give-Give relationship (Budha in love with Budha!!!) or may be a Take-Take relationship (Narcissus must have attended some couple therapies regarding the troubles he had in a relationship with himself!!!) Therefore I believe it is safe to concede that in all fairness, the equilibrium of any relationship (between two humans or man-beast) is reached and sustained by this very simple concept of Give-&-Take! Now while I prefer considering personal relations over and above social instances, this here is not just some individualistic observation but something that I see thriving in the whole social setup around me.

You go to market (Oh call it a mall if you like!), you buy some stuff, you pay for it (Give-&-Take; DUH!!)

You become the loyal customer of some company, the company provides special services to you (Give-&-Take)

You join a new college and you make new friends, and those who are not friends...what do you call them?! Acquaintance, a.k.a Give-&-Take!!!

You work in a group... I guess there is no Give and Take dynamics here, only a painful experience for most...(may be not the free riders...)

And finally there is the personal front. It is said a mother is the only person who always gives to her child and doesn't expect anything in return. Well, I beg to differ...I mean, we all are aware of the dialog "Dudh ka karz"!!!

When it comes to fathers, they are big givers too, but they take a lot too... sometimes your self esteem, sometimes your power to choose a life partner, sometimes your independence, sometimes all your fears, sometimes all your debts (:P)...sometimes simply your affection...(they are emotional but hate showing it so they take the first two instead of simply asking for the last one!)

With brothers and sisters its pretty much clear usually (they want what you want so its kinda Take-what-she-is-taking-and-give-what-she-is-giving!)

Friends usually don' bother with defining the type of relationship...even though they know its give and take, they also know that "sab pyaar de bhukhe ne"!

And finally that special someone. Now all of us know about "unconditional love" but even laughing it off will mean entertaining the idea at all. So my take on it is of utter neglect! LOVE is there, alright, but its conditional ( and in most cases its Conditioning also!). After all, Chacha Choudhry ka dimaag chahe computer se bhi tez chlta hai and he can outsmart the most calculative of criminals, but even he knows the right time to be home for dinner and Mini!!

In the end, it is out of complete reverence for the whole Give-&-Take concept that I would like to say -it wouldn't have been easy for humans to have proliferated their specie so much if it hadn't been for the simple barter of things(and ideas) and cooperation amongst communities. Why still the idea is maligned with shades of materialism and lack of emotionality, I fail to understand!

Sister est la Soul-Link!

With1.2billion people thriving in a country as great as India, I doubt any of us can fail to relate with the equation one shares with one's sibling(s). For all of us have at some point in time pestered our mommy for a new bro or sis...and then again, many of us have questioned them many years later, that what came over them,that they brought such monsters into this world!!!

But this relation is much more complex than it appears. Personally, i have only one experience here which i can scrutinize from various angles (having a sister). Now the bond two sisters share; has shades of love, hate, jealousy, comradeship, support, judgement, preaching, guiding, mentoring, agreeing and disagreeing and agreeing to disagree...And all these shades are bound to make such a relation a most cherished possession on occasions...(and a pain in the neck, on others!) I am quite sure that a sis-bro n bro-bro relation must be steeped in its own intricacies and experiential learnings, but what two sisters share, at times transcend the boundaries of blood ties and enter the realm of being soul-mates of each other.

As Samantha reminds all the friends in SNTC-2 that they are soul-mates and they don't ditch each other for anyone else; same way, sisters are always there for each other! Fashions come and go, sisters share every dress and stiletto they have... career opportunities come and go, sisters share all the aspirations and face all the difficulties together... guys come and go, sisters share every feeling they have...

But come on, a sister isn't really an angel personified!

She can be your worst competition... the source of your worries... the reason why you are always "the bad gal" at home! In short, you can't live with or without them...

While the more contemporary writers fail to stress on the importance of this relation, the classic works from the pens of Jane Austen (Pride and Prejudice) and Margret Mitchel (Gone with the wind); throw light on some distinct shades of this relation.

Two people, same blood, different thinkings, similar upbringings, and end result... a sweet relationship; sometimes sweeter than friendship; sometimes more reliable than a diary entry and sometimes sturdier and more giving than true love. Sisters show each other what they are in their hearts, expose the true self of the other...bringing out the best in the other (much like Nescafe) and in doing so, become a sole-link-to-the-soul! For who better to acquaint you with yourself than the one you share your DNA with!!!

They prepare you for the world and when you come back home all beaten up, they cheer you up (with weird "mujhra" on any song playing on the radio) and send you out again with newfound confidence and hope! They proclaim their love for you all of a sudden when you are raving about some new found friend and they are ready with an "i told you so" whenever you are crushed with the cruelties of this world!

Still..."Phoolo ka taaron ka, sb ka kehna hai....ek hzaaro mein....la la la la la....:P

....saari...umar...hume sung rehna hai....":D