Kaleidoscope

People my age must remember those almost extinct "mela(s)" now, where we used to go with our parents and nearly choked them to death with the constant harping on about the urgency of buying something from the "gubbare-wala"(Balloon vendor). Oh well, the occasions were many when such urgency surfaced as the balloon vendor had more than balloons in his treasure-chest of a cycle! Those queer goggles, multicolored flutes, magic games and what not...but something that becomes even more intriguing with age (unlike all the other stuff we enjoy as kids) is a kaleidoscope.

Looking into a tube of cardboard, a kid never expects to see all those colors forming magical images at the other end and as much as it mesmerizes a kid for its sheer creativity and stroke of genius, it still remains a toy for her. Every few years when you revisit the kaleidoscope, it excites your senses, relaxes them at times, ignite deeper meanings in your mind about life, people, events and yourself! Somewhere down the road of life, it stops being a toy and becomes a totem that leads to self discovery. For its physical presence is not necessary, like a wise metaphor it keeps you sane and amuses you in the face of deepest of miseries.

A recent turn of events reminded me of it and so the writing bug caught up with me once more. How different elements of life amalgamate into one event and how people of different backgrounds, with different needs, different priorities in life, different values; all come together to fight for their rights. As a critic of diary entries, I have never really appreciated documenting real events. What I do appreciate about writing is referring to events in subtle ways and driving home the point. Thus while the event is inconsequential for the readers, its message may be resonant with them in many walks of life (to everyone, their own!).

Pretty early on in life, it becomes clear to most of us that "ye duniya bdi sangdil hai" (:P). Even for optimists, cynicism about certain facts of life becomes and integral component of thinking. But at times this "duniya" really surprises you. You see unity after repeated exhibition of diversity... You see the dawn of a common interest after the night of hidden agendas... You realize what is important and what is not, all at once! That is precisely when I am reminded of a Kaleidoscope; those little pieces of different shapes and colors(people), lying in different corners of an orthogon(diverse cultures, needs, interests, values), coming together in different patterns on every rotation(the ups-and-downs of life) to make beautiful images and patterns(sense out of the insanity of this world).

Of course it occurs to me from time to time, that man is a social animal...he is expected to flock together and act as a mob. But seeing it in a good light is refreshing at hell really!!! Especially when you are part of the mob (obviously an intelligent mob), you feel its heart, its pulse and how it is fueled by not just biscuits, chips and pav-bhaji but by the sheer strength of emotion and an unsaid (or may be overstated at times) understanding. Victory in the end or compromise...matters for some and doesn't affect others...what stays with all of us is the pattern that life's kaleidoscope presented this time, and how we all fit into it so seamlessly...enhancing each other's beauty(inner...DUH!!!) and value! :)

Mind over Matter

At times one wonders what's real and what isn't? We think something and life takes a whole new direction! We do all thats good for this world and we get zilch in return! We be everyone's friend and everyone seems hell bent on making an enemy out of us! We blame the destiny for things, this "duniya" seems mean a lot of times. Oh the cruelties one faces, while going through the passage of life!!!

Of late, I have been part of many a conversations in which I found myself negating the concept of externality of events. So obviously, this piece is not going to be any different! What if co-incidence is just a series of pre-meditated incidents arranged by some random mix of people? What if the probability of winning or losing is directly related to the intellect(or lack of it) of the parties involved? What if doing good to the people who reallllllllyyyy need it is more prudent than doing good for the world (that way there is higher probability of getting zero+ returns from good-doing)?

After all "mind over matter" is not just some far fetched idea best suited for movies and literature alone. Its a concept that many have acknowledged and adapted to for their benefits and that of others. I like to believe that whatever we get in our lives is fruit of our own strengths and weaknesses. This thought itself pumps me with such confidence and enthusiasm about life!!! Whatever I do, I get this feeling that I will be responsible for whatever good will come out of it (and if it doesn't work out,I will know what NOT to do!)

But the convenience of passing on the baton of negativity to an external force seems such an easy solution, that many of us like to keep things the naive way! Of course I remember the days when cycling my way to school I used to "pray"(!!!!) for a good grade in some test I took. And obviously I am not that old that I can' remember the times I first blamed God, destiny and more recently genes for my obesity! Blaming everything bad on forces beyond you is easy and as much I would like to condemn it, I do see the other side of it as well.

The victory of mind over everything material is not just manifested in one's ability to face all odds based on one's sole will power. Its also there in the survival instinct of every human being that is hardwired so deep in the psyche! We blame the world for our misfortunes because blaming ones own self for everything can really be crushing at times...internalizing pure glory and pride can be fuel to one's narcissistic fire but internalizing all responsibility can really kill one's buzz!!!

Therefore fascinatingly, the theory of karma (as influential as it may be), seems to be wanting in many areas. By the end of every entry I make, I end up contradicting my own beliefs. Unhealthy as it may be for a self assured and self believing individual like me on an emotional level, I am sure this exploration by expression is healthy is some obscure way.

For what is more productive than building a sound "mind" that can conquer all that "matters"?! :)