Forget And Forgive!

Of all the good things one learns in life, "forgiveness" is probably the most difficult and most noble. As a child, I never understood the big deal about "forgiveness". Especially when someone used to quote Gandhi, to stress upon its importance, I used to feel the urge to be as unforgiving as I could be!!!

Forgetting, however came easily to me (like it does to most people). You learn so much in school, and you forget the correct answers when there are just 5minutes left to attempt the one word answer type questions (in a 3 hour long exam!)... You learn to drive a bike with a perfect balance and develop a good reflex for brakes and race, but you forget it all when first time on the highway u see a truck coming your way... You learn to love and respect your parents, but you forget it when your plans to go to a friends party are thwarted for being grounded... You learn what it is to be like "you", but you forget it when someone special enough comes along and want to make "we" with "you"...

But forgetting can't be that bad, if everyone does it so often! And so i believe in "forgetting and then forgiving" instead of "forgiving and forgetting". Of course 'Phoebe' does it the best way; she forgets and doesn't forgive (in that episode when she dreamed about Ross beating her in a Chess game and then turning into Cameron Diaz; she forgot it was a dream but remembered that Ross was on her "list")... But that is possible for F.R.I.E.N.D.S, for us lesser mortals, life demands a lot of forgiveness and allows very little forgetfulness.

However unaccommodating you want to be for those who wronged you, you are lead into believing that it will go uphill from there and some "forgiveness" is warranted for. No one expects you to turn the other cheek anymore when slapped on the first one, but no one expects you to turn around and fight back (or okay, hold a grudge even!) People blatantly expect to be forgiven (as "Sorry" has become a 'commodity' and no longer is a 'product'); and what more, they expect you to forget, they ever wronged you!

Detesting the things work around on this planet never solves a purpose, though! The simple formula thus, for self gratification and inner peace is "forget and then forgive". Ever wondered after a week of cold war with a friend, "what the hell was the reason for the fight, to begin with?!?!"...or..."maybe it is time we made up, i hardly recall what we started fighting for, hope she doesn't either!!!!"... That is the scene when 'forgiveness' can come on stage. When all the hurt and anger and disgust is no longer attached to a reason, isn't it easier to forgive?

Recently i watched a movie in which two desolate lovers get each other erased from their memories for the fear of hurting bad. But when they do realize what they had done, they get back together and forgive each other for all the meanness they served each other, everyday with! Therefore, even though "Forgiveness" is the noblest virtue we all learn, "Forgetfulness" is perhaps the greatest armor, nature has bestowed upon us. For to survive the heroic deed of 'forgiving' each time someone stabs you, a great amount of 'forgetting' is essential to protect your vitality!

After all, its not TIME that heals all wounds, its the inadequacies of the human mind that makes living with those wounds easier.